“I had to drop American Lit. for security reasons…”

It’s the latest breaking satire from The Extrapolater:

‘A politician in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma is thinking outside the box in the wake of recent school shootings, suggesting that students use thick textbooks as shields in case of armed attack.

Advocates of education hail the plan, saying it will serve double duty in the classroom. “It’s no secret that America lags behind much of the world in math and science.” said Oklahoma City school board president Wilbert Johannsen “But studies have shown that books in the math and science curriculum are always hardback and have an average thickness of 2-3 inches. I mean, reading is definitely important, but good luck deflecting a 9mm round with the trade paperback…’